How To Spot A Casanova: It’s Not Always Easy..

Casanova is an old school term for our colloquial Womanizer( coined by that Britney Spear’s music video), but it pretty much means the same thing–A Lothario, a Tom Cat, Player and Seducer.

I’ve heard some vicious stories, from so many women, about  getting played worse than a yo-yo, since they weren’t able to tell a ‘Casanova’ from a decent guy.

Well, it’s basically this, if he’s too good to be true than you better run. A Casanova is a Casanova because he has perfected his game to a tee. He’s so good that he’s able to seduce women– and it can be a proper woman– into the bed room, in the wink of an eye.

So,  here’s a few tips on how to spot these emotional blood suckers:

  • They are  ADDICTED to the the challenge, chase and game of love.
  • He disguises himself as a gentleman and seduces you perfectly well sans flaws; He’s basically so good, you wonder if he’s for real.
  • They struggle with low self-esteem so their notches up their belts make them feel a little better about themselves.
  • He’s impeccably charming. They have exquisite verbal skills and use that to their advantage.  Women are easily baited verbally and Casanova’s  are very in tune with w omen’s emotions, thus, they know how to entice a woman’s ear with sugary pleasantries and feign concern over their diatribes about personal or work life.
  • He’s handsome, well groomed, stylish and has perfect manners.  Though, he says it’s because of his profession,  it does  makes you wonder where exactly did he learn that from?
  • Pay attention to your gut feeling about him,  is there something strange about the way he looks at other women? What is that mark on his neck?  There is a reason why women have intuition…
  • He has severe commitment issues.
  • He overly wines, dines and gifts ( flowers or candy)  you– until you gift him back at night.
  • He’s extremely sensual and knows exactly what a woman wants because he’s had practice from his past conquests.
  • He’s not very up front about his true  intentions and tends to be very vague.
  • If you heard through the grapevine about his sordid past being a player, man whore or a seducer,  then there may be a speckle of truth to that  rumor.
  • They QUICKLY lose interest in you when you don’t give them what they want..
  • Once you figure him out, and it all fizzles: don’t expect to maintain anymore contact with him  since your  only use to him is over.
  • They ignore having guilty feelings or may not feel guilt at all, as strange as this sounds, this is also a huge indicator on identifying one of them..

Though this is a long list, it’s imperative that women need to sharpen their detective skills if they assume they  are dating one of these  womanizers. It’s not always so easy to tell from first glance or even from first impressions, whether or not the guy they  are ‘presumably’ seeing is a cad. They  do cloak themselves in human civility so well. So  just  remember   not get lost  into his dreamy eyes, charming one-liners or quickly agree to stay at his place that night.

They break hearts fast and move on to the next bed post. A word to the wise, don’t end up like Britney Spears, please don’t end up like her.  Would you want to star in a music video about being screwed over by these Casanovas?

16 Comments Add yours

  1. Laura says:

    Thanks for this advice, Sherryn!!

  2. No problem Laura, so many women out there have had their fair share of Casanova’s and I hope this entry helps women reject their advances early one before it’s too late, and they get led on.

  3. Jackie says:

    I like this! This is well written about the Casanova’s.. great advice 🙂

  4. Thank you for the kind words Jackie. I guess you can say hearing friend’s and acquaintances accounts of being led on have inculcated this entry for other women so they won’t end up feeling like a vending machine, hopefully…

  5. Rob says:

    Wrong! Most of that description applies to me and I’m not a player.

    “They are ADDICTED to the the challenge, chase and game of love”
    No, that’s just what boys have to do. Girls NEVER chase after boys.

    “He disguises himself as a gentleman…”
    Yea? How do you expect a guy to act around a girl? Rude?

    “They struggle with low self-esteem so their notches up their belts make them feel a little better about themselves.”
    Wrong. People with low self esteem don’t do this. It’s those who are so overly confident who have no disregard for anyone else’s feelings. Much like serial killers and rapists. They happen to think very highly of themselves!

    “He’s impeccably charming. They have exquisite verbal skills and use that to their advantage. Women are easily baited verbally and Casanova’s are very in tune with w omen’s emotions, thus, they know how to entice a woman’s ear with sugary pleasantries and feign concern over their diatribes about personal or work life.”
    How else are we supposed to talk to girls, as if they’re just one of the guys at the bar? Would you like us to greet you by farting on you? It’s not our fault girls want to be sweet talked by the guy in the Old Spice commercials….

    “He’s handsome, well groomed, stylish and has perfect manners. Though, he says it’s because of his profession, it does makes you wonder where exactly did he learn that from?”
    So you want us to look like slobs? Let me know next time you go out on date with a homeless man…

    “Pay attention to your gut feeling about him, is there something strange about the way he looks at other women? What is that mark on his neck? There is a reason why women have intuition…”
    Now you’re just encouraging girls to be psychotic, which causes boys to run away before dishes are thrown at them…

    “He has severe commitment issues”
    Maybe the girl just isn’t what he’s looking for? What if HE’S been hurt in the past? And what about girls with severe commitment issues? I’ve come across quite a few of those…

    He overly wines, dines and gifts ( flowers or candy) you– until you gift him back at night.
    Women are GOLD DIGGERS! Just kidding, I have to agree.

    “He’s extremely sensual and knows exactly what a woman wants because he’s had practice from his past conquests.”
    Or maybe he was in a couple serious relationships and got his practice that way….

    “If you heard through the grapevine about his sordid past being a player, man whore or a seducer, then there may be a speckle of truth to that rumor.”
    Nope. Girls talk a lot of shit WHENEVER things go sour.

    “They QUICKLY lose interest in you when you don’t give them what they want..”
    Exactly, some personalities just don’t click. Not much you can do about that

    “Once you figure him out, and it all fizzles: don’t expect to maintain anymore contact with him since your only use to him is over.”
    I actually don’t even know what this means…

    “They ignore having guilty feelings or may not feel guilt at all, as strange as this sounds, this is also a huge indicator on identifying one of them..”
    I think I have to agree with that too

    But I think overall the thing you’re saying to look out for are contradicting what a lot of women say they want….

    1. Sarah C says:

      Okay, let’s be honest, I stopped listening to you after the first thing you said. Maybe you just aren’t lucky enough to have been pursued by a woman, but women don’t just wait in towers for their handsome prince to come… Unless they’re really kind of dumb. Sorry, 20th century and all that.

      Secondly, arrogance is not self-esteem. These guys are really well… Fake as silicon tits. They pretend to be something else, they think having sex is some kind of life accomplishment and self-affirming experience. The logic is, well, I must be worthy as a person if I can make women sleep with me and wow, these women are so dumb to fall for these lines.

      You’re probably not one of these people, but you seem ready to defend them. These men and the women who do the same things are all fluff and no substance. It isn’t that we should be paranoid about them, but that if you want a relationship then you don’t want the cotton candy of the dating buffet. It exists and you just steer clear of people who are trying to falsely impress you with something they aren’t because they want to get laid. That’s people of both genders, btw, because this sort of behavior is something all kinds of people fall to.

      In concussion, we ain’t talking about you, so no need to get all defensive.

      To Sherryn, I have seen a lot of men and women of all sexualities do all this same stuff and I think you hit on some great points especially the gut instinct thing. Everyone should listen to that feeling more often and stop giving sly kinds of bad news partners and friends second, third, and forth chances they don’t deserve.

  6. Well, Rob, I’m glad you feel strongly about this entry. With that said, I used outside research to come up with this data and it’s ‘click-able’ in this entry. I’ve also talked to a slew of women who’ve dated authentic lotharios that have wronged them in unthinkable ways.

    Everyone is free to think what they want to think and I think it’s great that you are solely basing your argument on your own personal experiences, that’s nice. I do wish you had a stronger argument, with concrete evidence versus basing this on you, per say.

    Also, I never said all men are like, this just the select many who seduce and squash women into emotional bits. If you say you are not that kind of person, even though you also say these traits relate to you, kudos for you not being a man-whore.

    But there are plenty of fish in the sea ( Surely, BP did kill a-many thanks to that oil drama) who have these traits and and screw with women and DITCH THEM, if they don’t put out quick enough. Everyone is entitled to believe what they want, but there are multitude of facts that exemplify what I am writing as factual.

    I think this is a great debate, and I open up my blog for open discussion 🙂

  7. Sarah C, you have a good head on your shoulders 🙂

  8. Shanila says:

    SOO true about these so called “men”….they just don’t get it some times! I know all these are true…because most men act ignorant and it is obvious that all they want is a good roll around in the sheets.. I feel embarrassed for guys like this who never get what they were wanting all along. Any man who reads this and gets emotional about this entry, is GUILTY of the clues and examples noted above. I don’t understand why men like play with a woman’s emotions and make them think something is even there, when there is nothing there to begin with. Men who lead women on will always be known as a Casanova, no matter how many times they deny it. Soo..go ahead Casanova’s admit it!…its the first step of over coming this mental issue you have!

  9. I agree with you Shanila on your thoughts and feelings about this entry. I can only assume that any man who reads this entry and who instantly gets perturbed over it relating to them, are simply mad at themselves for behaving this way and furious for getting caught red handed. I will admit, not all men are this way and there are some good men who know how to treat a woman right.

    But, if there is a man who knowingly leads a woman on and carries with them these traits then I think women from all backgrounds needs to keep their eyes and ears open. If they want to be led on then it’s fine but if they want something more, they should really be careful with who they date and not be so trusting when everything is so rosy and perfect.

  10. Peaceful Life says:

    It’s really nice writing.Thanks for sharing.

  11. No problem, thank you for enjoying it. There are just way too many Casanovas out there and not enough articles on how to spot them.

  12. I hope no girl dates a man like that!

  13. bob smith says:

    I’ve been called a womanizer, I took offence. So I had to look it up, why was I being called this awful thing .. turns out I’m nearly a womanizer … Except I’m not looking for a one night stand. I love women, they are my addiction, love how they smell, move, look … Giggitty … Ladies, I may come off as a womanizer but I’m not. Will I date other girls besides you, yes. Are we exclusive, no.

  14. Nathalie says:

    Extremely well-written article! Just had my first experience with a notorious “Casanova” in the city where I live. He fell into all the things written there. I thought I were experienced and sassy women who knew exactly how to play along with this “Casanova” but I had to admit he won the game! I want all the women who tends to fall for this type of men to read this and contemplate about dating strategy in the future. Better not to waste our precious time and energy into this sort…

    1. Miss Quirky says:

      Hey Nathalie! I appreciate your candor! Please share this article with as many women as you know to break the cycle.

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